ok im finally back into the groove of things at school. after finals have finished i cant wait until i get things set in place so i can do well later
i guess that things with my friends havent gotten any better because i still feel like crap
the boyfriend thing is still going well but it isnt as fun to have a boyfriend without anyone to tell things about him to...*cries*
but i guess i still did this to myself so i guess i desrve what i got
and if they cant accept my appology, at least this is what my mom said, then they really arnt ment to be your friends.
i kinda aggree with this because ive been ((emotionally)) in pain for like the past 2 weeks! and after multiple ways of appologizing im still getting a no thats not why you should be sorry or a no i cant ever forgive you

to the extent of my knowledge i said something to make jacob mad and i took things from his reactions and took it too far and i guess to him i may have "chosen" ryan over him
and with sami ive blamed jacob's actions on her and the way i feel on her
and thats just NOT right
i treated both of them badly and i still deserve to feel bad about it and i definatly dont desrve forgiveness but i wish i could have it
not as a friend but as a human
what do you people think ((at least whom ever reads my sappy sad entries))


~the angel of darkness